A ‘Branding’ Horror Story…and a $50,000 Bet.

by Greg Milner on 15/10/08 at 1:40 am

ATTENTION All Medspa, Day Spa & Salon Owners: Sure, do dumb, wasteful ‘branding’ – at your peril.

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been told by salon & spa owners “I want to get my brand out there…”

*Sigh*

Can’t blame you all, I suppose. ‘Getting your brand out there’ is the sort of crap and nonsense peddled by so-called marketing ‘experts’ and the ignorant (often the same people), in lieu of any actual knowledge and experience – tested and measured – of accountable direct response marketing.

And it’s not just small businesses who fall victim to this wrong-headed thinking.

Horror Story:

As reported on the business website bnet.com this week, ‘branding’ is mostly and excuse to waste marketing money.

In the late 90s, Ken Fitzpatrick, the CMO at Computer Associates, spent $100 Million on a massive branding exercise. Here’s what Computer Associates got for their money:

A new logo that was pretty much like the original one
A useless, meaningless slogan: ‘The software that manages e-business!’
A directive that everybody in the firm answer the phone with that slogan
Dopey TV ads featuring chickens.

Here’s that TV ad:

As the commentator on bnet says, that’s about a million bucks per chicken.

It’s little wonder that small businesses see this sort of nonsense and think ‘Gee, if these big companies are doing this kind of ‘branding’ I guess I’ve gotta do the same kind of thing. Those ad agency guys can’t all be wrong.”

Well, yes they can. And often are.

Here’s what’s instructive:

If somebody who doesn’t work in your business sees your logo, ‘slogan’ or ad and says “Huh??” then you’ve wasted a ton of money.
Direct response ONLY. Don’t do branding. Brand-building, if it occurs, is a fortunate by-product. Sacrifice image for impact. One of our Inner Circle members, Katarina Nikolovski of Afresh Hair in Newcastle, New South Wales, tells me this week she mailbox dropped 700 of our ugly, copy-intensive flyers each week for 6 weeks and picked up no fewer than 98 new clients. That’s measurable direct response marketing. What do you want – sexy looking ads that stroke your ego, or money in the bank?
The ‘experts’ tell you to keep your marketing clean, plenty of open spaces, not too much copy. People won’t read it. Drivel. DECADES of testing, measuring have proven BEYOND DOUBT that copy-intensive, tightly-packed ads, flyers and letters sell more. Less is NOT more. More is more.
This applies to ALL businesses. No business is different. Somehow, you think yours is, your customers are too dumb/too busy/too sophisticated to read lots of copy. Nonsense. Get over it.
This applies to ALL forms of media.
This applies to ALL people. Street sweepers to Fortune 500 CEOs ALL respond to and buy when exposed to well-crafted, long-copy emotional direct response.
What YOU think about your marketing – it’s layout, ‘tone’, offers, the typeface used etc – matters not a damn. The only votes that matter are delivered with money. By your customers

IF YOU ARE STILL UNCONVINCED…

I’ll take bets. Next Monday, October 20 in Auckland, Tuesday in Wellington, and Tuesday the 28th October in San Diego, I’ll be teaching some of these principals, with actual examples of typical, loose ‘branding’ advertising compared with compelling Direct Response, at a series of seminars for salon, day spa and Medspa owners.

Here’s the bet: send me one of your ‘normal’, standard, garden variety ads. I’ll write a Direct Response version of it. Test one against the other. Loser pays the $50K.

New Zealand: we have about FIVE seats left for the Auckland and Wellington seminars. Call our office DIRECT by close of business FRIDAY to get your last-minute tickets.

Auckland: Monday, October 20

Wellington: Tuesday, October 21.

San Diego: ticket sales for this half-day event have just opened (late!) If you are a Medspa owner and want to know how to stop spending money on useless ‘brand’ advertising and instead use compelling direct response marketing to fill your spa with patients, go here to find out more, and phone Ryan Harris of the Medspa Marketing Institute on 858.736.9005

Rating 3.00 out of 5

A post by Greg Milner

The odd idea, a bit of prodding, a nudge here and there, a little fun, and the occasional dose of brutal reality. Greg is co-founder and CEO of Worldwide Salon Marketing, a writer, direct response marketing consultant, specialist marketing systems adviser and coach. He (sometimes) accepts private consulting clients.